quiet pride

Whispers in deceiving patterns
With often unrecognizable traits
But it causes your conscience
To grip your soul in grief

It tells you that you are always the one to initiate
Someone else can do it this time
It sighs in frustration that your life is more complex than the next person's
They can be the one serving for a change

It haunts in discouragement
That self sacrifice shows no outward fruit
It wounds you in disgust when someone with your same situation
Is given more grace, more help, more understanding

It loves the fact that your marriage is more peaceful
Than the couple right next door
It whispers that you did a better job
And now you can sit back and soak in some type of reward

My quiet pride hates to be misunderstood
Because then I do not look as good
My quiet pride hesitates to try too hard
Because failure wounds such pride

Such traits masquerades strength in pain
It divides the body of Christ
And leaves a Christian in chains
But oh that the realization of it might drive me to my knees . . .

To the foot of the cross, where I belong