Sometimes I wonder if God throws something up at me, just when I am starting to get comfortable, to make sure that my heart is still with Him - completely. Undivided. Wholly His. No competition. My God is a jealous God. He wants to be my All-in-All.
So you can have the man of your dreams. You can have your whole life planned out just how you want it. You can have your entire family together again. You can be anticipating a summer wedding outdoors and watch yourself get excited. You can have an incredible family. Increased health. Genuine love. Real relationships.
Then the clouds arise in the sky without warning. And you long to run to the High Tower of refuge. You bow your knee and yield it all. You give it all to Him because you finally realize that you can't hold it all. You can have everything one day and lose it all the next. But the Lord gives and the Lord takes away. May my lips never cease to bless the Lord. How I long to run to Him and feel the comfort that comes from being close to Him in the midst of the storm.
Life isn't about obtaining something that you have always dreamed about. It is about preparing yourself for eternity. Even the most valuable things in this life are of no comparative value to an eternity with my Savior.
Life is about dying.
Lord, teach me how to live as though I am dead. Dead to my dreams. Dead to my ideals. Dead to my plans. Dead to my hopes. Alive in You. Alive in Your will. Alive in the joy of being Yours.
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